Wednesday, April 18, 2007

I always think of the moms ...

It's amazing how much becoming a Mom changes your perspective on things. In some arenas, it's changed my entire way of thinking. Even after the boys were born I never would have seen myself in the role of stay-at-home-Mom. I was busy climbing the banking ladder, doing well, and making steady progress. I had a wonderful sitter who the boys considered to be a third grandma. They were well cared for. And I was doing my thing. And then, one day, when work interfered yet again with my Mom-job, it hit me that I was in the wrong place. And now here I am. Being a Mom has not only changed thinking, but my entire way of behaving at times.

Last year when Cameron died, I was filled with grief for his family and friends, especially Lane. But, more than anything else the thought of what his Mom was going through tortured me.

This shift is never more emphasized than at times like now. When I saw the first news reports of the horrific events that happened at Virgina Tech this week, I was filled with shock and sorrow like everyone else with any human feeling at all. But immediately, on the heels of that, I began imagining the Moms. Those Moms across the country who have kids there. I could imagine one of my sons being at that school, seeing those reports and not being able to reach him to know that he was safe. How torturous were those minutes and hours for those Moms? And I can't even begin to imagine how the Moms, those Moms for whom that 'I'm okay' call never came, are coping.

Being a Mom is a wonderful job. Well, most of the time. But sometimes it's a heartbreaking job, even when you are not the one directly affected. But we're all affected to a degree. My prayers and tears fall for the families of those students. Especially the Moms.

1 comment:

Nicole said...

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It is hard being a mom. I always thought it would get easier as my kids got older, but really it gets harder. When they are little you have so much more control about who they hang out with and what they see and hear.