Things I don’t get …

Not things I don’t know. That list would be unfathomably endless. And, let’s face it, for the most part I won’t know that I don’t know them until the occasion arises that I need to know them and then realize that I don’t. So, in the meantime, here are a few things that I don’t “get”:

• The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. Look at those people. They’re gorgeous. How hard is it to get them paired off?

• Flip-flops anywhere outside of the beach. Especially in the winter.

• Pretty much anything my sister-in-law says, thinks or does

• Nascar

• Thongs that show above your pants

• Flesh that shows above your pants if it’s not completely firm and pudge-free.

• Being more concerned about the quality of your house than the quality of your life (no shoes, no food, no pets, no fun!)

• Not attending your child’s events if you’re able at all

• Not taking photos of your child’s events even if you do attend

• The fuss over Grey’s Anatomy. I’ve watched it. Seems like just another medical show to me. I've obviously missed something.

• Why my dog barks at those of us who live in the same house she does. Every. Single. Time. We. Come. In. Sometimes even when we just come out of the bathroom.

• People who don’t read books. And are perversely proud of that.

• Why the 15-pound, fully-clawed cat allows the 8-pound, de-clawed cat to torture her. Why doesn’t she just kick his ass?

• Why I’m always amazingly productive on Tuesday mornings. Oh, wait. That one I DO get. That’s the morning Warcraft is down for maintenance.

• How otherwise rational adults can become utterly hooked on a computer game. Wait. I actually get that one, too.

• Purse pooches. WTF? Oh, I know who started that ridiculous trend. But even more unfathomable to me is why anyone would want to emulate her.

• Women, or men for that matter, who love shoes. I know I’m in the minority here, but I still don’t get it.

And that, really, is just the tip of the Things I Don't Get iceberg.